Law \ Legal

Trumpworld Goes All In On The Marion Barry Defense After FBI Raid

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(Photo by PAUL J. RICHARDS/AFP/Getty Images)

You know Donald Trump’s lawyers are legit because of all the time they spend on television accusing people of doing crimes citing exactly zero proof. Rudy Giuliani has played this role for years, happily accusing various Bidens and Clintons of all sorts of felonies. But now Rudy is busy trying to fend off charges of his own. Plus there’s that little matter of his license to practice law being suspended. And if we’re being honest, the president’s most famous pro bono lawyer is looking a little long in the tooth of late.

But never fear! A new crop of camera-ready lawyers has emerged to take over where Rudy left off, spouting whatever batshittery is required for the former president’s legal travail du jour. And since the big story yesterday was the warrant to search Mar-a-Lago, this day requires speculating with no basis in fact that federal agents planted evidence on poor, innocent Donald Trump.

First up Christina Bobb, the lawyer actually present at Mar-a-Lago who when federal agents executed the warrant, went on One America to plead the president’s case. Luckily she is also employed by One America, so you know her reporting is tip-top.

“I don’t think there was actually anything there worthwhile. We’ll see what they come up with,” Bobb said after FBI agents walked out with an additional ten boxes of documents. “If they did, it will be interesting, since they actually precluded me from watching what they did.”

Bobb conceded it was unlikely that the FBI would plant evidence, but, “At this point, I don’t necessarily think that they would go to the extent of trying to plant information. I think they just make stuff up and come up with whatever they want.”

Note that this person has actually seen the warrant at issue here and the list of items removed. She is perfectly free to explain what the agents were after and what was in the boxes. She chooses not to because it’s more fun to just accuse federal law enforcement officials of making stuff up.

Next up was Alina Habba, the New Jersey lawyer whom Trump dispatches for acts of performative legal trolling, like threats to the Pulitzer board if it doesn’t rescind prizes for the Post and the Times, and suing Hillary Clinton and half of DC for doing The RICOs to him.

“Quite honestly, I’m concerned that they may have planted something. You know, at this point, who knows,” she vamped for Fox News’s Jesse Watters.

“I don’t trust the government, and that’s a very frightening thing as an American. If I didn’t want to be an American — you know, this is Third World stuff. We’ve heard it. This is Cuba. This is not our country.”

Or it is our country, but not as experienced by people who present as white.

And having gotten instructions from the top, the agenda was set. Here’s Senator Lindsey Graham, a JAG lawyer for decades, agreeing with Watters that the FBI routinely doctors evidence and plants evidence.

Graham went on to demand that the Justice Department immediately reveal the underlying affidavit and make a full explanation to the American people — something he knows perfectly well it will not and cannot do during a pending investigation without violating due process.

And Senator Marco Rubio is probably thirsty after spewing so much hot garbage to slime US Magistrate Judge Bruce Reinhart, who authorized the warrant.

“I actually don’t think they went in looking for documents,” the senator tut-tutted to Sean Hannity, citing exactly no proof. “I think that was probably their excuse. That they found some Obama donor judge, not even a judge, a magistrate. I think they went in there looking to see whatever they could find.”

He left out the part where Judge Reinhart donated to Jeb Bush in 2016. As Rubio, a 1996 graduate of the University of Miami School of law, surely knows, magistrate judges almost always sign warrants. It’s actually their job.

Now Trump has joined the chorus of his supporters suggesting that the FBI planted evidence, although he could publish the list of what was taken and has studiously avoided doing so. Kinda looks like they found something pretty incriminating, huh?

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